Shut Out and Powerless To Help: Why Parents Need to Get a Power of Attorney for Adult or College-Age Children

If you’re a parent, you know that your job doesn’t end when your child heads off to college and moves further into adulthood. No matter how old or independent your kid may get, you’ll always want to be there for them, help them through tough times, and otherwise do everything in your power to ensure their health and well-being.

But while your job as a parent may not end when your child turns 18, many of your legal rights as a parent do. Once they hit that milestone birthday, your child is no longer a child in the eyes of the law, and your status as a mom or dad won’t give you the right or ability to help your child like you would want to in the event of a catastrophic accident or adverse health event.

In the absence of documentation providing such rights, you’ll no longer have an automatic right or role in your child’s healthcare or financial decisions. Without the proper documents, a doctor won’t be able to discuss your child’s condition or share their medical records with you. You also won’t have access to your child’s bank or credit card accounts if you need to help them pay their bills while they are seriously ill.

Imagine how powerless, frustrating, and terrifying it would feel to be sitting in a hospital waiting room, unable to get information from a doctor or nurse, with no ability to understand what is happening and being shut out of critical decisions that your child may not be in a condition to make on their own.

To prevent this situation, parents of college students or adult children should have their kids sign a durable power of attorney for healthcare (including HIPAA authorization and release). This document gives physicians permission to share and discuss the child’s medical information with their parents or other individuals designated on the form. Your child should also execute a power of attorney for finances so you cantake care of their bills, deal with their landlord, access their bank accounts, and otherwise handle their affairs if they become incapacitated.

Of course, parents can’t take care of these critical documents on their own. Since it is their child who is granting the power and authority to act in their stead, they need to be part of the process. But as a parent, you can certainly drive the process, advise your child on what these documents are and what they do, and work with an attorney to prepare them.

Here is a primer on powers of attorney you can share with your child so they understand why getting these documents signed and completed is so important to everyone involved.

What is A Power of Attorney?

A power of attorney is a legal document that allows a person to designate a trusted family member or other representative (the “agent”) to make specific decisions, handle tasks, or address matters in the event that the person becomes incapacitated or otherwise needs someone to act on their behalf.

A power of attorney can be very broad or narrowly tailored. Importantly, the person granting the power (your child in this case) can remain in control of all decisions until the conditions set forth in the document arise.

There are two primary contexts in which powers of attorney are used: health care decisions and those involving a person’s assets and financial affairs.

Power of Attorney For Healthcare

A power of attorney for healthcare can empower you to obtain medical information and make important decisions about your child’s care and treatment in the event of their incapacity. You can present a properly drafted and executed power of attorney for health care to your child’s provider, who will then have legal authorization to discuss your child’s condition and care with you.

The following are eight specific powers that are often included in a power of attorney for health care for adult children:

• The power to agree to, refuse, or withdraw consent to any type of medical care, treatment, surgical procedures, tests, or medications. This includes decisions about using mechanical or other methods that affect any bodily function, such as artificial respiration, artificially supplied nutrition and hydration (tube feeding), cardiopulmonary resuscitation, or other forms of medical support, even if deciding to stop or withhold treatment could or would result in death;
• The power to have access to medical records and information to the same extent that your child does, including the right to disclose health information to others;
• The power to authorize your child’s admission to or discharge (even against medical advice) from any hospital, nursing home, residential care, assisted living, or similar facility or service;
• The power to contract for any healthcare-related service or facility, or apply for public or private health care benefits;
• The power to hire and fire medical, social service, and other support personnel who are responsible for your child’s care;
• The power to authorize your child’s participation in medical research related to their medical condition;
• The power to agree to or refuse using any medication or procedure intended to relieve pain or discomfort;
• The power to decide about organ and tissue donations, autopsy, and the disposition of remains as the law permits;

Power Of Attorney For Finances

As the name implies, a power of attorney for finances executed by your child gives you authority over some or all of their assets and financial affairs if and when they become incapacitated. This is no small matter. It is essential that the power of attorney specifically spell out the limits of the agent’s authority in terms of what kinds of transactions or matters they can take charge of.

What authority is granted depends on the specific language in the document. A person granting a power of attorney may make it extremely broad or limit it to specific acts. This could include paying bills, buying or selling property and assets, managing investments and accounts – all the nuts and bolts of a person’s financial life.

Since powers of attorney are so impactful and important, literally giving someone control over another person’s life, they need to be carefully and thoughtfully prepared in accordance with the law. Failure to follow required formalities or inclusion of avoidable ambiguities can create confusion and leave these documents in legal limbo during moments that require clarity or quick, decisive action. Working with your lawyer (and your child) is the best way to ensure that your family is as prepared as can be for unforeseen, sudden, and difficult circumstances.

If you have questions or would like assistance preparing powers of attorney for your family, please reach out to Brian LeVay or your contact at Latimer LeVay Fyock.